Only Laura

I wonder if there has ever been another mother who received a phone call quite like this one.
"Hello, Mrs. C., this is the school nurse.  Please, don't be concerned.  We don't think there will be any bad consequences, but the principal said I needed to call you and let you know what happened today.  (Pregnant pause)  Laura got her arm stuck in a soap dispenser."
Multiple images of how such a thing could happen flashed through my mind, but I didn't ask very many questions.  I listened to her side of the story and waited until the end of the school day for Laura's version.


The setting:
The middle school at that time was structured in the "open classroom" design.  Instead of walls partitioning off classrooms, there were groupings of desks with bookcases in between.  The entrance to the lavatories was visible from several classroom areas.  The toilets were in an enclosed area, but the sinks were out in the open and could be seen by these classrooms.  The sinks were round with water coming out in all directions, and the soap dispenser was large, round and in the middle of the sink.  It had small holes in the top.


The story:
Laura used the lavatory, and when she came out, she noticed a little girl standing at the sink and behaving in a distraught manner.   She had dropped her barrette in the soap dispenser and had no idea how to get it out.  Laura, who had an ADHD diagnosis, was very impulsive but also very compassionate.  The combination frequently got her into trouble.  That day was no exception.  The barrette was in the soap dispenser.  There were holes in the top of the soap dispenser.  Obvious and immediate conclusion, with no time out to consider consequences...plunge her arm through the hole to retrieve the poor, sad child's barrette.
Uh, oh....arm goes in the soap dispenser, but cannot be pulled out.
As Laura told it, the first teacher that passed by said, "Huh, I'm just going to leave you there!"
Eventually adults willing to help converged on the scene:  the principal, the vice-principal, the school nurse, assorted maintenance and janitorial staff.
They soaped up her arm.  
They greased her arm with petroleum jelly.
They attempted to dismantle the soap dispenser.
Finally a janitor very carefully slid a hack saw blade in between Laura's arm and the edge of the hole.  As gently as possible, he sawed outward until the top of the dispenser could be spread apart and Laura's arm released.  He successfully freed her without so much as a scratch.


The Aftermath:
A few weeks later, I ran into a friend.
"Laura, got her arm stuck in a soap dispenser, didn't she?"
"How did you know about that?"
"Oh, I was at a luncheon for hostesses for the Miss New York State pageant.  One of the other hostesses is a teacher at the middle school.  She told this hysterical story about a kid who got her arm caught in a soap dispenser, and when she said the girl's name was Laura....well, I knew who it had to be."


I thought I would get a bill for the damage to the soap dispenser, but I never did.  Almost 30 years have passed, so I guess they're not going to send one.