Entangled

Stirring in the night,

Our arms and legs entwined.

My leg between yours.

Yours over mine.

Entangled.

Thinking the others thoughts,

You say what I am thinking.

You laugh as I begin to speak,

Knowing what I will say.

Entangled.

You haven’t done the taxes,

I am upset and threaten,

“I will file on my own.”

The accountant says, “Not possible.”

Entangled.

Strange to see in our children,

Strands of our DNA combined,

Each looks and acts like you.

Each looks and acts like me.

Entangled.

What if one of the threads,

In the tapestry dies.

Loses the ability to interact,

Withers away or disengages?

Untangled.

What if the warp and woof,

No longer cross over.

Will the fabric fall apart?

Will one of us be left in strings?

Entangled with memories.

Home Alone!

The first time we left our kids alone to “babysit” themselves, they were about eleven, twelve and thirteen.  Nate was not born yet, so I’m talking about Janelle, Laura and Michelle.  I don’t remember where Bill and I went, but we decided the girls were old enough to manage a couple of hours without getting into too much trouble.  Hmmm……

We arrived home and everything seemed to be OK on the first floor of the house, although the girls did seem to be especially gleeful.  On going upstairs, we discovered that the hallway had been turned into a tangled spider web of yarn strung between door knobs and light fixtures.  

When we went into our room and flipped on the light switch music began blaring.  They had plugged a tape recorder with the volume turned way up into the outlet which normally had a lamp plugged into it.   I kept my cool through all of this.  The monkey business had kept them busy all evening, so they hadn’t gotten into any serious trouble.

When I went into the bathroom, I noticed that the fuzzy cover from the toilet seat was on the floor in the corner and was obviously wet.  “What happened here?” I inquired.

It seems the girls had decided that if they put up the lid over the toilet, and placed the fuzzy cover on the seat instead of the lid, I would come in and not realize this, and when I went to sit down, I would fall butt first into the toilet.  The problem was that after they set this all up, they decided that it would work best if the room was dark, so they needed to unscrew the light bulbs over the sink.  They couldn’t reach the bulbs, so Laura without thinking about what they had just done, decided to stand on the toilet seat....and fell in feet first.

I totally lost it at this point.  The mental picture of her falling in was more than I could handle, and I burst out laughing.  So much for maintaining any serious ability to tell them not to pull such a stunt again.

Later trying to crawl into bed and finding that they had “short-sheeted” it was pretty anti-climactic.  I just started laughing all over again about Laura finding herself standing in the toilet. 

I am actually smiling right now as I think about it three decades later.

Surreal Hallelujah Chorus

Last evening the sermon at our church included a reference to the Hallelujah Chorus, and the fact that it is traditional to stand when it is performed.  I never hear a reference made or stand during the performance of this inspiring piece without my mind going back to the one time, I did NOT stand.

Decades ago, a church in our community was hosting a college choir.  They were in need of overnight housing for the members of the choir, so I offered our home, even though we were not regular attenders at that church.

I was enjoying the concert which was coming to an end, when a man who knew me well tapped me on the shoulder and said, “Something is wrong with my mother.”

I turned around and about two rows behind me sat an elderly woman whose skin was ashen, her lips blue, and her forehead covered with drops of perspiration.  She was slumped in the seat.  She clearly was not breathing.

I jumped up and hurried to her.  I could immediately see that her dentures were covering her airway.  I dug them out of her mouth and handed them to someone….I don’t remember who.  People quickly moved to the side, and we swung her legs up and laid her out flat on the church pew.  I knelt on the floor, pulled her jaw forward, and began mouth-to-mouth resuscitation.  At some point in this process, the choir began to sing and the congregation stood.

There I was kneeling on the floor giving mouth-to-mouth during the Hallelujah Chorus.  My mind was trying to wrap itself around this surreal situation.

It did not take long for her to begin breathing on her own.  Someone had run out and called an ambulance.  I suppose the Hallelujah Chorus was planned as the finale, but the choir continued singing until the EMTs had removed her from the scene, and she was on her way to the hospital.

I later learned that she had run out of her heart medication and had not told her son.  She apparently experienced an episode of heartbeat that was sufficiently irregular that she lost consciousness.  When she did, her jaw relaxed and her dentures fell over her airway.  I have seen this same phenomenon on another occasion in a church situation and resuscitated that woman also.  But…that time, the Hallelujah Chorus was not being sung.

Pilate's Question

Jesus answered…..”I came into the world to testify to the truth.  Everyone on the side of truth listens to me.” 

“What is truth?” Pilate asked.  John 18:37-38

 What is truth?  Today while I was out walking, I was thinking about how relevant this question is 2000 years after Pilate asked it.  How does one tease the grain of truth out of the heap of lies with which we are confronted?  A confusing mix of fact and fiction assaults us on every possible level from international to personal.  A plethora of information is available to us and anyone can create and distribute it.  My son once told me with a smirk, “57% of statistics are made up on the spot.”

Flossing is an essential part of dental health…or….nope, we have discovered it doesn’t make a substantial difference.

Aluminum in deodorant causes cancer…oh, good grief, no it doesn’t.

Hillary’s use of an unsecured server has put our national secrets at risk and contributed to the execution of an Iranian nuclear scientist.  No…this is false.  She did nothing wrong.

Donald Trump….huh….where to begin?  He contradicts himself so often that no one can possibly tell which of his statements are true and which are false.

Someone on Facebook acts depressed and lots of “friends” immediately say, “Oh, don’t be sad.  You are a beautiful person inside and out.”  Even though it is quite possible that neither is true.

Justice Scalia was actually murdered at that ranch in Texas.  What?!  Do you believe those conspiracy theories?

Someone close to me makes a promise I know he/she won’t keep or tells me a whopper they think I will believe.

Someone explains or excuses some behavior, and I know they are lying to themselves.

What is truth?  Is it based in my reality or in someone else’s? 

Jesus was saying that He is the standard for truth.  I try to judge truth by what I read in the Bible, and I pray for discernment.  That is the only way I know of to “listen to Him.”  Sometimes, however, I do wish I could audibly hear Him.  “Whether you turn to the right or to the left, your ears will hear a voice behind you saying, ‘This is the way, walk in it.’” Isaiah 30:21.  That, however, in context seems to be a promise for a future day.

So you and I are left in this confusing and imperfect world struggling each day to conduct our lives in keeping with the light we are given.

Send forth your light and your truth, let them guide me.  Psalm 43:3

How I will vote...

The presidential election is about 3 and ½ months away.  I read a survey result that 58% of voters don’t like either choice.  I am in that majority.  I don’t trust either Trump or Clinton to act in the best interests of the country.  I think they are both self-serving and dishonest.

At this point, I don’t think I can vote for either.  I know that voting for a third party candidate is viewed as throwing ones vote away.  However, living in upstate New York and usually voting Republican means that my vote normally doesn’t count anyway.

I believe that ultimately God controls human history and is moving us in the direction of Christ’s eventual coming to straighten out the mess we have made.  We may not like what happens on the short term.  It may seem “wrong,” but historically God has shown Himself capable of using some vile people to accomplish His long-range purposes.

The outcome of the election is not my responsibility.  It is God’s.  My job in the upcoming election is the same as my job every day, and that is to be faithful in doing what I believe He is calling me to do.  I don’t think I should be voting for either candidate in order that the other won’t win.  It is not my job to figure this out.  Human understanding can lead to strategies that backfire.

I am planning to vote my conscience and leave the result to God.

I may wake up the day after the election and be surprised at the results.  This will not happen to God.

If He does not want either of the current candidates, He has multiple ways to handle this without any human intervention.

Eventually God’s judgment falls on nations which turn their backs on Him.  It may be our turn to experience this.  Either Trump or Clinton could be the instrument by which this happens….or not.  I do not know God’s mind.

I will pray for Him to direct my mind today, on November 8, 2016, and every other day He gives me breath.

Thoughts on Perspective

Aging is like standing in an open elevator from which one can see farther and farther as the elevator rises, but the objects in view become smaller and smaller.  Details become less important and overall concept seems more relevant.

I have tried to imagine how different ones perspective would be as he looked at the earth, if he were as small as an atom versus being as large as a galaxy.  I believe God both permeates and encompasses everything.  His perspective is always perfect.

I am fascinated that one can be at the same coordinates in space, but if the time is different surroundings have a totally different appearance and impact…..a sunny summer day versus a snowy total white-out at the same point on a highway.

The same conversation or event can result in opposite opinions as to what happened depending on the prior experiences and inclinations brought to the occasion.  Since others aren’t privy to what is going on inside my mind, my words may be interpreted in a totally different context, and since I don’t know what is going on in their minds, I don’t know how they are interpreting my words.

We acknowledge 3 dimensions in space and one in time, but I suspect there are other dimensions to time, and I wonder if perspective itself is a dimension.

Is it possible during life, to begin seeing things from God’s perspective, an eternal perspective outside of time which sees detail and overall concept simultaneously?

I can’t really wrap my head around the concepts of infinity and eternity…..are they forever or only a blink in God’s eye?  I think the answer is “yes.”

I also think I had better just go have breakfast and accomplish something concrete today lest trying to stretch my brain to comprehend the incomprehensible sends me down the slippery slope and off the edge.

If All Lives Matter....

If all lives matter, we need to get rid of the total disrespect for life exhibited in video games, movies and television shows.

We can’t possibly get rid of all guns, kitchen knives, baseball bats, cars, bare hands and other objects capable of taking a life.  The problem is not the objects.  The problem is the attitude which trivializes life…unless you are the star of the show.  They will never kill off James Bond and probably not Jason Bourne.  We are shocked at the deaths of Han Solo and Will Gardner.

NCIS is one of my favorite shows, but it typically starts with a murder.  I was sad to see Person of Interest go, but when I reflect on that show, I can’t begin to count the number of individuals “offed” by John Reese and Sameen Shaw.  We are expected to be OK with this, because they are all bad.  In True Lies when Arnold Schwarzenegger’s character is asked, while under the influence of truth serum, if he has killed someone, his response is “Yes, but they were all bad.”  The bad guys die, and the grief of their family members is never shown.  The good guys die, and the grief is momentary, and the show goes on.  We don’t get to see the agony still present a year later.  (Exception:  Gibbs on NCIS will never get over the murder of his wife and child.  It is part of his character.)

I have never played a violent video game, but I understand they exist.  I do know that in video games it is possible to earn points that get one an additional life.  Seriously?  An additional life does NOT happen in reality.  What are we allowing children and young minds still in their formative stages to learn?

I guess you might tell me that we can’t change violence in entertainment either.  We have “free speech” which unfortunately protects hate speech and violent images.  Our society apparently has a lust for such, and the entertainment industry is just giving us what we want.

So, we all clamor into the arena and cheer for the gladiators to be eaten by wild beasts or to kill each other.  That attitude did not bode well for the Roman Empire.  What makes us think we will fare any better?

The basic nature of man has not changed or improved since Cain killed his brother Abel.  We are NOT evolving into a more enlightened species.  We have just become more sophisticated and technologically advanced in the way that we kill.