Entertaining the Thought

Committing an atrocity takes some thought and planning.   How does a person go from being “normal” to becoming a monster?

A fleeting thought passes through the mind.

The thought returns and is briefly reflected on.

The details of the idea are sketched in.  Perhaps at this point, the person believes he is only writing fiction in his mind. 

He meets someone either in person or through a book or online influence who reinforces his idea.

Carrying out the plan begins to seem possible.  Details are worked out.  Where would I buy what I needed?  When would I do this?  How will I pick the location?

Information is gathered.  Items to carry out the plot are actually purchased.  They sit in his room begging to be assembled or tried out.  Bomb-making equipment is stashed in the closet or a weapon is hidden under the bed.

Increasing amounts of time and thought are expended.  At some point the balance tips, and it is no longer “if,” but “when.”

A date and location are chosen.  The person gets up in the morning knowing this is the day.  ‘I am actually going to do this,’ plays over and over in his mind.

The process can’t possibly occur in a couple of days.  Sliding all the way down the slippery slope would take weeks, months or years.  A person could stop himself at almost any point in the process and say, “NO!  I will not do this evil thing.”  But…it would be easier to stop near the beginning than the end.  As the “event” nears, the imperative will become stronger and pick up speed.

It must take a certain amount of social isolation or at least, compartmentalization, for no friend or acquaintance to recognize the roaring freight train of the inevitable.

And then…the whole world knows what has gone on silently behind closed doors and in the recesses of the perpetrator’s mind.  Those who love him protest that it cannot be so.  Those who knew him casually are surprised.  The rest of the world asks ‘why?’ or shrugs it off, if it didn’t impact them directly.

The world would be a terrifying place if we knew how many people were someplace on that slope of tiny decisions spiraling downward.